Asians weren't enslaved on a massive scale here in the United States. Your arguments seem to boil down to (a) your experience says something is true or (b) if one group does well in one area, all would be well for all groups in all areas if they just tried a little harder harder. David Sears calls that premise symbolic racism, especially as it is applied to Balck Americans.
I appreciate your engagement, but I don't feel like you have any real answer -- other than systemic racism -- for why Black women who do everything right still get very poor life outcomes.
I'm NOT arguing that it is a great idea to have kids in high school and drop out. (This is what my mom did, and, sadly, she died at age 55.) I'm arguing that getting a PhD and getting married does little to protect some ethnic minority mothers against sytemic racism.
I offer the last word to you.